The Smith & Jones SketchbookFriday, 9.30-10.00, BBC1
I blame Beyond The Fringe. Excruciating throwback to a time when BBC commissioning editors laboured under the appalling misapprehension that any comedy act in receipt of an Oxbridge education merited its own series. Younger readers may be alarmed to learn that contemporaneous critical judgement marked out Griff Rhys Jones as The Funny One. And, relatively speaking, he was, thanks in no small part to playing opposite a man whose sole comedic device was to raise his lower lip above the upper until taking on the appearance of a bulldog trapped in a car door.
The Culture Show
Saturday, 8.20-9.10, BBC2
This week the most presumptuously-titled programme on TV reports from the Cannes Film Festival, and includes Mark Kermode conducting a ‘major’ interview with Ken Loach on his new Palm d’Or contender, ‘The Wind That Shakes The Barley’. Exactly what would constitute a ‘minor’ interview is a matter for conjecture, though disaffected Beeb insiders deem the involvement of Davina McCall ‘more than likely’. Reviews of ‘United 93’ and ‘Poseidon’ also feature, as well as young Brit composer Daniel Hardy journeying to Vienna to bask in reflected glory on the 250th anniversary of the birth of Mozart.
Full Length & Fabulous: The Beckham’s World Cup Party
Sunday, 9.00-10.30, ITV1
The world’s second-most lucrative footballer and 7,855,449th most successful singer host 500 ‘lucky’ ‘stars’ in the grounds of their Hertfordshire mansion. Or, possibly, the Ninth Circle of Hell, as would befit a night compered by Chris ‘I’ve Got A Brand New T.A.R.D.I.S. And I’ll Give You The Key’ Evans, and including a rendition of ‘Angels’ by Robbie ‘Take That? Don’t Mind If I Do’ Williams. One can only hope that, as Sloshed passes round the Gordon Ramsey-prepared nibbles, nice Mr Beckham will offer some relief to the nanny.
The Culture Show
Saturday, 8.20-9.10, BBC2
This week the most presumptuously-titled programme on TV reports from the Cannes Film Festival, and includes Mark Kermode conducting a ‘major’ interview with Ken Loach on his new Palm d’Or contender, ‘The Wind That Shakes The Barley’. Exactly what would constitute a ‘minor’ interview is a matter for conjecture, though disaffected Beeb insiders deem the involvement of Davina McCall ‘more than likely’. Reviews of ‘United 93’ and ‘Poseidon’ also feature, as well as young Brit composer Daniel Hardy journeying to Vienna to bask in reflected glory on the 250th anniversary of the birth of Mozart.
Full Length & Fabulous: The Beckham’s World Cup Party
Sunday, 9.00-10.30, ITV1
The world’s second-most lucrative footballer and 7,855,449th most successful singer host 500 ‘lucky’ ‘stars’ in the grounds of their Hertfordshire mansion. Or, possibly, the Ninth Circle of Hell, as would befit a night compered by Chris ‘I’ve Got A Brand New T.A.R.D.I.S. And I’ll Give You The Key’ Evans, and including a rendition of ‘Angels’ by Robbie ‘Take That? Don’t Mind If I Do’ Williams. One can only hope that, as Sloshed passes round the Gordon Ramsey-prepared nibbles, nice Mr Beckham will offer some relief to the nanny.
The X:Factor Battle of the Stars
Monday, 9.00-11.00, ITV1
A host of people you’ve never heard of combine to sing covers of songs you wish you’d never heard in the first place. Kate Thornton hosts, presumably remembering to give stern warning of the poor soul who was forced to watch the whole of The X:Factor’s last series. According to a psychiatric report, he came away with the jaded, listless sexual appetite of a 60-year old colonel.
Tim Marlow On…
Tuesday, 7.15-8.00, C5
Poor Five is still trying to reconcile itself to a dual-personality, a purveyor of high and low culture with bugger all in between, and spent a fretful night of tossing and turning following yesterday evening’s tawdry little 'Private Parts: The Penis' episode . It resolves to see a priest. The priest is sympathetic, and suggests that atonement might come in the form of setting aside an evening devoted to art, specifically the Italian Baroque movement of the 17th century. Five isn’t quite convinced that such an overtly religious theme will play too well with the largely secular and hugely desirable A1/B1/C1 demographic, and instead plans to showcase highlights from the New Tate Modern, undergoing its first re-hang since opening six years ago. Warhol and Picasso might not necessarily be to the priest’s taste, but wouldn’t he find some empathy with the rigid self-discipline of a compulsive neurotic like the Dutch Neo-Plasticist painter, Mondrian? Satisfied, Five books a return visit to the priest, same time, same place, next week.
Can We Save Planet Earth?
Wednesday, 9.00-10.00, BBC1
For those moments when even a polite “How do you do?” won’t quite cut it. The estimable Attenborough has come a long way since placating knife-wielding tribesmen with good old fashioned manners, and tonight concludes his two-part study into how the planet might be saved from catastrophically rising temperatures and seas.
Monday, 9.00-11.00, ITV1
A host of people you’ve never heard of combine to sing covers of songs you wish you’d never heard in the first place. Kate Thornton hosts, presumably remembering to give stern warning of the poor soul who was forced to watch the whole of The X:Factor’s last series. According to a psychiatric report, he came away with the jaded, listless sexual appetite of a 60-year old colonel.
Tim Marlow On…
Tuesday, 7.15-8.00, C5
Poor Five is still trying to reconcile itself to a dual-personality, a purveyor of high and low culture with bugger all in between, and spent a fretful night of tossing and turning following yesterday evening’s tawdry little 'Private Parts: The Penis' episode . It resolves to see a priest. The priest is sympathetic, and suggests that atonement might come in the form of setting aside an evening devoted to art, specifically the Italian Baroque movement of the 17th century. Five isn’t quite convinced that such an overtly religious theme will play too well with the largely secular and hugely desirable A1/B1/C1 demographic, and instead plans to showcase highlights from the New Tate Modern, undergoing its first re-hang since opening six years ago. Warhol and Picasso might not necessarily be to the priest’s taste, but wouldn’t he find some empathy with the rigid self-discipline of a compulsive neurotic like the Dutch Neo-Plasticist painter, Mondrian? Satisfied, Five books a return visit to the priest, same time, same place, next week.
Can We Save Planet Earth?
Wednesday, 9.00-10.00, BBC1
For those moments when even a polite “How do you do?” won’t quite cut it. The estimable Attenborough has come a long way since placating knife-wielding tribesmen with good old fashioned manners, and tonight concludes his two-part study into how the planet might be saved from catastrophically rising temperatures and seas.
Five Disasters Waiting to Happen
Thursday, 9.00-10.00, BBC2
Environmental issues have been much to the fore of late, what with Bristol gaining its first Green councillor, Blair finally ceasing to swing both ways and coming out as a nuclear lover, and David Cameron inviting hordes of Fleet Street’s finest aboard an ozone-depleting plane to join him in staring forlornly, in a compassionate Conservative kind of way, at a melting Norwegian glacier. A prescient time, then, for Auntie to screen her Climate Chaos season. As the far-from-sensationalist Environment Agency raises the spectre of water levels rising above London’s lampposts, tonight’s programme reports on conflicting prognoses from around the world about just what can be done to help others avoid the fate of the blameless inhabitants of Tuvalu. A small island slowly being engulfed by the Pacific, its people are in flight, amongst the first to be tagged ‘environmental refugees’. Somehow, TV Listings doubts that even the Home Office’s finest could spin a send-them-back-to-where-they-came-from approach on this one.
Thursday, 9.00-10.00, BBC2
Environmental issues have been much to the fore of late, what with Bristol gaining its first Green councillor, Blair finally ceasing to swing both ways and coming out as a nuclear lover, and David Cameron inviting hordes of Fleet Street’s finest aboard an ozone-depleting plane to join him in staring forlornly, in a compassionate Conservative kind of way, at a melting Norwegian glacier. A prescient time, then, for Auntie to screen her Climate Chaos season. As the far-from-sensationalist Environment Agency raises the spectre of water levels rising above London’s lampposts, tonight’s programme reports on conflicting prognoses from around the world about just what can be done to help others avoid the fate of the blameless inhabitants of Tuvalu. A small island slowly being engulfed by the Pacific, its people are in flight, amongst the first to be tagged ‘environmental refugees’. Somehow, TV Listings doubts that even the Home Office’s finest could spin a send-them-back-to-where-they-came-from approach on this one.
+-+Copy+-+Copy.jpg)
No comments:
Post a Comment